Monday, August 9, 2010

young love

How many times have we (girls in particular) gotten up in the morning and the first thing on our minds is a guy? (or a girl, if you're a guy). How many times have we gone a full day and NOT been able to get them off our minds? Everything we do, everything we hear, everything we see..reminds us of that "special someone." How many times have we thought we're in love? At 15 years old, girls are sitting in their bedrooms on the phone with their best friends saying things like "i KNOW he's the one! I'm going to marry him. We're soooo in love! He's perfect and we're going to be together forever!!" A week later they're broken up because he flirted with another girl in third period. Then, this 15 year old falls "in love" again and again with several more guys before the end of the school year. We've all seen it a million times! Most of us have been there.

So, what makes us jump to such conclusions about our immature relationships? We're so quick to assume that the second someone gives us the attention we're so desperately craving for whatever reason...be it physical or emotional or just some kind words that make our hearts melt...then we think we're in love and that they're in love with us. We have this longing desire as human beings, I think, to be loved. And to love. We want to make someone happy and someone to make us happy, someone to complete us. Someone to fill an otherwise empty space in our life from a troubled childhood or lacking love from a parent, whatever the excuse may be. I've fallen prey to this more times than I care to admit. It's sad and if we're honest with ourselves, often pathetic.

I'm reading "Dear John" right now, by Nicholas Sparks. It's an adorable love story and I absolutely melt at every chapter (I'm a hopeless romantic and have unrealistic expectations about love, I know). Anyway, everytime I start to tear up or mutter a quiet "aww" at something cute that happens in the book, my mom looks at me and says "you know none of the stuff in that book actually happens in real life, right?" At first, I was irritated and angry that she would smash my dreams of a relationship like what John and Savannah have! But...then I started thinking. She's right. She's absolutely right. I mean, how often do relationships like this REALLY happen? Boy meets girl, love at first sight, can't get each other out of their heads, want to spend every waking moment together, head over heels in love, happily ever after? Granted, I haven't finished the book yet, so I don't know how it ends. I'm just making my assumptions. But it's very rare to actually see a love like that transpire.

I dream of a slow, perfect romance. Starting out as friends, slowly becoming more and more, never getting too physical so that the relationship doesn't become all about that and it's focused primarily on honoring God, honoring each other, respecting each other's wishes, making each other happy, and eventually falling in love; never throwing around the words "I love you" until we mean them.
I dream of falling in love with the perfect man, having the perfect relationship, the perfect wedding, the perfect kids and living in the perfect house. Every little girls dream, I'm sure. Maybe it'll happen. Maybe I'll be lucky. Or, maybe I won't. I won't know that for a while because I'm barely 18. I'm in no hurry to rush off and get married to the first guy that says he loves me. Perhaps he does. Unlikely, but possible. Too many guys use the words "i love you" as a way to get another notch in their bed post while the girl gets another broken heart and shattered dream. So maybe God has brought me that man, maybe I know him right now, talk to him everyday, hang out with him, and I don't know yet that he's the one for me. Or maybe He hasn't. Maybe God will make me wait. I've never been very good at waiting, I'm not a patient person. But something tells me waiting for this, will be totally worth it and make it (when it finally does happen) THAT much more wonderful! But I'm done acting like a silly teenage girl that thinks she's in love with every cute boy she sees, "oooh-ing" and "ahhh-ing" at every pretty smile and sweet word. My prince charming will come. Or maybe he already has.

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